“Change can be frightening, and the temptation is often to resist it. But change almost always provides opportunities – to learn new things, to rethink tired processes, and to improve the way we work.”
What if A didn’t necessarily need to precede B…or what if there was a way to get to Z by circumventing the linear alphabetic song.
In other words, we often set up rules in our minds as to “the way things need to go” in order to get from A to Z. And, by establishing such rules — consciously or (for the most part) unconsciously — we create a reality. Change becomes prescribed to take place a certain way.
We often can’t imagine a result we’re committed to having in our life, our career, our business, our relationships simply showing up. That’s what’s called “magical thinking,” and we all know we have to work for it.
So says the industrial mindset, and we can all agree that simply saying it or waiting for it doesn’t have it appear.
And yet, somewhere within that rigid and calculated “truth”, if there were the slightest crack of radical possibility that things may not be so fixed as how we see them, what might have a chance to happen outside the rules?
There are philosophies that say the results that come to us are not so much a function of what we are doing as who we are BEING: the general outward expression of our most deeply held truths.
There are yet other philosophies which tell us that it is the thoughts that we hold predominate in our conscious mind which attract to us our experience. Plus, we all know that those thoughts we hold in our SUB-conscious mind are huge factors or culprits in our life, depending on what we’re attracting.
Let’s not throw out our earnest-strategy babies with the bathwater. Coming up with our plans and directions to pursue are healthy and give us confidence (e.g., “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail”).
Yet, perhaps there’s value in making room for unexpected and unforeseen fortuitous factors to creep in.
Here are a few thoughts to consider:
Pick an area of your life where you’d like to see results you’re currently not experiencing.
Is it in the area of relationship? Maybe dating? Or how about the area of career?
Look to see what “rules” you’ve created about the way things need to go in order to have that result.
For example, I need to be on 4 dating sites and go out with 3 first dates each week. Or, I need to get my resume in perfect shape and then start looking for openings by reviewing online job boards.
Just look beneath your assumptions and outline the steps and processes you believe must take place for it to happen.
Begin to ask yourself some simple questions that take you outside of those rules.
What if I were to get a call today from a friend who wanted me to meet someone? What if I actually looked around me today and created some casual conversations? What if I were to hear about a new company or meet a new person who turned me onto to a new opportunity?
Seems simple, but we don’t often just allow ourselves to ponder what it would feel like if what we seek were simply to come.
Allow yourself to keep doing what you think you need to do, yet allow yourself also to expect the unexpected.
Simply seeing how our rules have blocked us into a reality that must seemingly go a certain way can allow the unforeseen and unexpected to arise.
Here’s the big question: what do you have to lose by simply pondering some what ifs outside of your rules?
“Alice laughed. ‘There’s no use trying,’ she said: ‘one can’t believe impossible things.’
‘I daresay you haven’t had much practice,’ said the Queen. ‘When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.'”
-Lewis Carroll, Alice Through the Looking Glass