Darrell Gurney
Author Archives: Darrell Gurney
Darrell Gurney
Funcertainty
“Uncertainty is an uncomfortable position. But certainty is an absurd one.”
—Voltaire
The mature human psyche rarely voluntarily jumps into the game of uncertainty.
As we get older, we can become ever more attached to the knowing of what’s coming next, the assurance of our needs being met, the certainty of the path before us.
A layoff, business downturn, or even the inner need to make a significant change in one’s work, relationships, life, etc., can bring about fear of the unknown.
Yet, in that quest for knowing everything ahead of time, we may miss interesting opportunities and sidepaths along the way.
Think about it: when we go on vacation, though we may plan certain activities, do we want to know everything we’re going to experience beforehand?
There’s no fun, surprise or adventure possible when we already know.
Though it goes against the default closing of the mind and human spirit, taking on uncertainty with an attitude of fun can be a game worth playing.
What totally uncertain aspect of your life could you bring into a game of fun and exploration?
Got funcertainty?
“When nothing is sure, everything is possible.”
—Margaret Drabble
Aging Parents – What Should I Do?
Aging parents.
It’s a topic that no one likes to think about, let alone talk about. Our parents have always been the strong ones, the ones in charge, the knowledgeable ones. However, as we ourselves grow older, we are forced to come to the realization that our parents are growing older as well.
Sometimes we realize it all of a sudden, we go to visit them and suddenly they seem weaker and more frail. Sometimes it is a slow realization; they start forgetting things, walking becomes more difficult for them, they seem less energized, they become more irritable. However we come to the realization, it is never easy for us. As their children it is natural that we feel sadness, concern, anxiety, fear, and even anger at this realization. It’s normal and it’s okay. The important thing to focus on is the next step.
Depending on if you live near your parents or live far away, there are different options. Below I have created a couple links for you to start exploring your options. Helping your parents through the aging process is never easy, but there are ways to make it easier.
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They May Not Mean To, But They Do (a new novel about aging parents)
Although this process is full of anxiety and sadness, don’t forget that there is always the opportunity for fun as well. “How can this be fun?” you ask. Just check out these photos by Tony Luciani who is the caregiver of his mother. Click here to see the whole article!
Bestful
“If you’re doing your best, you won’t have any time to worry about failure.”
– H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
We all truly want to do our best in our work, relationships, contributions and life.
And yet that inner voice is rarely satisfied, no matter how it turns out.
Every now and then, I’m so moved by quotes, that I am compelled to share them all.
So, I offer my “best” quotes to support you being as bestful as you can with yourself today.
“Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your very best.”-Andrew Carnegie
“Why worry? If you’ve done the very best you can, worrying won’t make it any better.”
-Walt Disney
“Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.”
-Og Mandino
“Do what you love to do and give it your very best. Whether it’s business or baseball, or the theatre, or any field. If you don’t love what you’re doing and can’t give it your best, get out of it. Life is too short. You’ll be an old man before you know it.”
-Al Lopez
“Doing your best is taking the action because you love it, not because you’re expecting a reward. Most people do the exact opposite: they only take action when they expect a reward, and they don’t enjoy the action. And that’s the reason why they don’t do their best.”
-Miguel Ruiz
“Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.”
-Maya Angelou
“My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”
-Oprah Winfrey
Got bestful?
“It helps if you remember that everyone is doing their best from their level of consciousness.”
-Deepak Chopra
Who Says You Have to Retire by 65?
Retirement.
You get married, raise a family, work to support your family, and then you retire. That’s just the way it is. Right?
Wrong. Actually, retirement is a fairly new concept; and the concept of retiring in your sixties is even newer.
During the Industrial Revolution, many aging factory workers refused to stop working, even as their ability to work slowly started deteriorating.¹ It wasn’t until the 1930’s that the concept of making people want to retire was born with the Social Security Act. Since then, retirement has continued to evolve and change, but a bigger change is on its way.
According to a new AARP survey, over 50% of people surveyed believe that they will continue working past the age of 65. Now, that doesn’t mean that we never want to retire², instead, we just believe that we still have plenty to contribute to society. We still are skilled at our jobs, actually with all of our knowledge we have gained over the years, we probably know more than we ever have before.
Gone are the days of hitting 65 and expecting our life to be almost over. In the past few generations, the average life expectancy has increased by 29 years and shows no signs of slowing down.³ These days we know that we can still contribute to society, we can still help make the world we live in a better place, and, most importantly, we aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.
¹The History of Retirement
²AARP Life Reimagined Survey
³Life Expectancy in the USA
The Back Forty INFUSE Program
“I felt liberated to look at my life and career thus far as the R & D phase for what I have yet to design…buckle up phase two!”
—Hilary C., Marketing Director
Imagine there is way more in you to be expressed and fulfilled. Imagine and believe that you can restart…or, better yet, really start for the first time!
Consider that the only start that matters is the one you do now, and that life was designed that way. Your midlife opportunity is awakening to discover all that you’ve learned from a first half of R & D (research and development) and capitalizing on it to design your own uniquely playful, passionate and purposeful second half.
You have yet to do what you came here to do. No matter what has come before — be it perceived major successes or miserable failures — as Frank Sinatra sings “The best is yet to come, and babe won’t it be fine”.
The Back Forty philosophy is radical. It says whatever has come before does not determine what comes next. It’s about a radical renewing of the mind into belief and action to play big. Come discover your Big Game Back Forty Future. It’s what you came for.
“I have done hundreds of courses in growth and development. This Back Forty Program has really impacted me. I’m 72 years old, and I can win my second half!”
—Gail E., Legal Professional
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